Someone asked me how I was doing the other day and without even thinking about it, I responded “I’m perfectly fine, how are you?” As you would expect, their response was identical, that they were fine.
It wasn’t until later that evening when I was sitting at my computer, staring at my to do list for the next day that I experienced a clear sense of how inauthentic I had been by saying I was fine. Given the political, societal, institutional, and climate crises we continue to live in I think in truth very few of us are perfectly fine. It led me to think about the wellbeing of the members of our health services and policy research community, who make their research home with CAHSPR. Not only do we face the “everyday” chaos that challenges most Canadians, but we face very real threats to science, to evidence and to the resulting impacts on the health of Canadians and our health care institutions.
There are a couple of books that I have read and re-read and which I reach for when I need a reminder of what matters in life. I offer them here for your consideration.
The first is by the wonderful Dr. Jillian Horton, “We are all perfectly fine: A memoir of love, medicine and healing.” In this book Dr. Horton contemplates her journey as a family member and as a physician and offers deep, and sometimes hilarious, reflections on the private suffering of those in the healing professions. Along with those reflections she provides an explanation of the resolutions that have helped her to grow and to heal.
The second is a book that has profoundly impacted me. I read it once again this summer because it reminds me of what matters in my life, what I can control, and what I would benefit from letting go of, for my wellbeing. It is “When Breath Becomes Air’ by Paul Kalanithi. Dr. Kalanithi was a neurosurgeon, just building his practice when he was diagnosed with Stage IV metastatic lung cancer and died a year later at 37. This is his inspiring, exquisitely observed memoir that somehow finds hope and beauty in the face of insurmountable odds. In his memoir he attempts to answer the question What makes a life worth living in the face of death?
The story is heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time. With each reading it leaves me with a new appreciation for the fact that those who are dying are the ones who have the most to teach us about life, if only we’ll listen. Outside of CAHSPR I am involved with a children’s hospice (Emily’s House) in Toronto and I have often marvelled at the life changing lessons I learn from the young people and their families who we serve.
While I hope these books resonate with you, I also want you to know that community is a key to forging a path through challenges. At CAHSPR we offer and nurture a place of belonging. We are your association, and we encourage and welcome you to find your place in our community.
